Jokes on bis: Technical ideas, patents, inventions, opening

Technical ideas

Installation of mobile connection stations in the apartments of the upper floors of the building

The demand in FSI FIIO: 2009122554/031143, from 15.06.2009

To reduce the damage of the eletromagnetic irradiation of the cellular telephones one has to make them less powerful. It is possible to do only by increasing the amount of the stations of mobile connection and by reducing the distance between them. Along with that the consumption of the battery's energy will decrease which will be followed by the increase of the time of conversations and waiting without a charge.
This is impossible to accomplish out of town where there are no buildings. The construction of multiple-storied buildings is expensive. Out of town the cellular will be working in a normal mode. A lot of houses within the town would allow to allocate the receive-transfer stations in any of the buildings which have the power of being connected to the telephone net.
The most part of the connections take place in the town. For the town I suggest making cellular stations with less power and throughput feature than the existing ones, as well as a smaller size, less weight and less cost.

They can be connected to the Internet via telephone net with the help of the special modem as ADSL. There will be no necessity in guarding the equipment if it is installed in residential and office rooms of the upper levels of the buildings. An antenna can be placed on the roof.
To make the owners or the tenants of these rooms (where the equipment is supposed to be installed) interested in it, one can provide them with free connection of their computers to the Internet or phone installation. The list of encouragements can be enlarged depending on what the marketing research will show.

The priority in data exchange should remain with cellular phones. According to this system, the amount of stations could be increased by hundreds times and make their repairment or replacement more simple and cheaper.
Due to the small remote distance to the station the phones in the town would be working in the economic mode (with less power), which will allow them to use less energy and to less expose the brain to the rays.


Laser projection of the commercial onto the clouds at night time

Modern laser shows prove that it is possible to project telephone numbers, goods images and services onto the clouds. It is prohibited to fly over Moscow so there is no risk of making some pilots in the sky blind.
It' s necessary to set the laser projectors to reflect the numbers and letters of an advertisement and the contact information (phone numbers, e-mail addresses, websites ad so on).

Due to the corruption and bureaucracy in Russia this type of technology will not be available for a regular person, but for the people of the Cremlin circles it will be easy to get a permit for projecting onto the sky.


Adding "Delete Files" feature in the automobile DVD

After automobile DVD receivers with built-in Card Reader appeared on the market, a necessity of deleting undesirable audio and video files occurred.
Before, it was impossible to delete anything from a CD, but now we can delete files from a Flash Card.
I believe, it is troublesome and even not safe to rewind a track that you don't like every time. It is very undesirable to distract oneself from driving.
If we add "Delete Files" feature in the DVD receiver, then, while listening, a driver will only have to press two buttons once. And when the songs are finally deleted, you'll not have to get irritated by a low quality of the record and silly songs.

May 2011

Improvement of hybrid cars with an opportunity to use their generators in producing the power of 220/110 V

Any hybrid car has a generator for producing enough current. To achieve the technical result it is necessary to install into the car an electric transformer.
With today's technology its weight will be not more than 2-3 kilos. For a car with the weight of 1 tonn or more it is absolutely insignificant.
It's obvious that the generator will not give us 100KV, but it will be more than enough for connecting the stereo-system and arranging a disco party outdoors.

On pickups it can be useful to connect the electric welding because these cars are frequently used by construction workers to transport their construction tools.

January 2011

The same location of the loudspeakers of a security office and the microphones within the guarded territory

The demand in FSI FIIO: 2009122548/031137, from 15.06.2009

In security offices they usually have monitors which show the images from videocameras. It is easy to overlook some motion on the monitor, especially when a security guard is tired.
I suggest installing microphones throughout the perimeter of the guarded object and on its territory, which the thieves are most likely to break into.
The microphones have to be connected to the loudspeakers which are to be located in the security office. The microhone installed on the left side of the territory should be linked to the loudspeaker of the left side of the security office. The right side microphone is to be connected to the right side loudspeaker accordingly.
The same procedure should be performed with the front and back microphones and loudspeakers. The microphones that are installed inside the guarded territory, have to be linked to the loudspeakers located on the ceiling of the security office. The loudspeakers are to be situated within the same distance as the microphones on the territory.

In this case even a dozed off security guard will instantly and without mistakes discover the place where the noise is coming from, which, of course, is the location of a break-in.
He will not have to look at the monitors in search of trespassers, which would be a waste of time and of the opportunity to catch them. This technology doesn't resolve the problems of bulky sensors, it only contributes to the present-day security systems.

June 2009

The programm of restoration of operating systems and data of the computer

The demand in FSI FIIO: 2009122549/031138, from 15.06.2009

After my experience with hackers' spying attacks, I realized the necessity of a program for archivation and full destruction of data of hard HDD disc. It should also be able to refresh BIOS and install operating systems and other applications, as well as data saved by the user.

Variant 1

First of all, the operating systems and necessary programs are to be installed. Then, all needed user accounts, e-mail contact list and internet pager should be registered. Along with that, favourite browser's pages should be saved and files for archivation are to be downloaded on hard disc. After all these actions were performed, download new BIOS into the special folder created by this program. Record the copy of your hard disc onto the optical DVD disc.

Variant 2

Install the operating system. Install this program. Download BIOS into the special folder created by this program along with the installation files of the necessary operating systems and other programs, and the keys to them. Any files that you wish to archive can also be downloaded into this folder. Then the archived copy of your system can be transferred to the optical DVD disc with the help of the same program.
If your computer gets infected, the only thing you will have to do is to insert the disc into the disc drive, restart the computer and press proper keys following the instructions. First, when BIOS is changed, then during the installation of the operating system and other programs. Their installation should be performed automatically, without user's interferance. The less you respond to the computer queries to perform some action during the restoration of the system, the better.

In the first variant, if we make the process of the system restoration fully automatic, then when leaving the working place for the night, it's necessary to restart the system and every new working day will begin with a clean PC.

This technology will make the attempts of the Internet spies worthless and their work - less productive, even during the computer attacks of so-called "lamers".

February 2009


When you are sick and tired of listening to the commercials on the radio in your car, you start thinking about how to make staying in the car more comfortable and how to get pleasure out of it?

Air conditioner, heating and servo drives do settle the comfort issue. But how can we take advantage of the proccess of driving and not make it just a ride with a purpose to get somewhere?

I find only one solution here - to listen to audiobooks or lectures.
What about buying CDs? The audiobooks are not sold at every corner and the choice is not really wide. So, the only decision is to download them from the Internet.

To reduce traffic it is necessary to present the contents in text format and compressed archivers. To unpack and voice, one can use the software and the vocal synthesizer installed on the car's personal computer.

For a good system's performance the speed of information exchange of a GPRS modem will be enough. Another advantage is that: if you heard some interesting information, you won't need to look for it on the audiocarrier.
You'll just have to print the text file of a lecture or a book, fully or partially, depending on your needs. In my opinion, a library database should be created and located in the Internet, with the division into levels and groups:

1. Lectures
1.1. Lectures by subject
1.2. Lectures by author

2. Books
2.1. Books by genres
2.2. Books by authors

In case of connecting a board mobile PC to the Internet by means of a broadband access, we need to add more items to the menu in these systems, dividing them into levels and groups as well:

1. Music
1.1. Music by genre
1.2. Music by singer

2. Music videos and movies
2.1. Music videos by singer
2.2. Movies by genre
2.3. Movies by director
2.4. Movies by actor
2.5. Movies by year of release; and so on.

The speed of the access to the Internet grows every year, which means that car owners will be offered more services.
To bring this idea to reality we should integrate the modem of wireless access to the Internet into the car's board multimedia system.

The same technology can be used to create a home system.
It is necessary to simplify the search and download of the contents in mobile systems. Because at home the cable access to the Internet has a great speed and a low cost of traffic, it is not difficult to download big size files.

I am sure that in 3-5 years this type of service will be offered by many auto manufacturers.
Almost any manufacturer in the world has an opportunity to make this system today. I think that this service should be developed by each manufacturing company separately.
In this case competing with each other they will be sharing positive experience of their opponents, improving their own system.

This is exactly what is happening with the navigation content manufacturers today.
It is too early to discuss whether the car manufacturers are going to make their services available for anyone else beside the car drivers of their own brand. But at first the volume of the library and the service range will be the influential argument for a potential car buyer.


I also want to give advice to the car manufacturers:
- You should send the audiorecording of the lecture about the advantages of the given car to each country in their language. The audiofile should be integrated into the multimedia system of the car. When it comes to the point of increasing the sales, you cannot rely on the autosalons' managers because they might not be the fans of the car brand they are selling. They need to do only one thing: offer a potential customer to take a sit in the car and turn on the lecture about the advantages of this car.
The lecture should be written by literate engineers with a literary talent, involving a consultation of psycologists and read by a professional announcer. It is also necessary to take into consideration the mentality of the nation when writing a lecture.

April 2011

The idea of creating a navigator, a telephone, a Pocket Portable Computer (PDA) with HDD connection

The demand in FSI FIIO: 2009122303/030799, from 11.06.2009

I contacted the manufacturers in China. They can produce such a device but they ask for a deposit for engineering and introduction to manufacturing.
The one who wants to get in one mobile autonomous device weighing about 300 grams a navigator, a phone connected to the Internet, PDA with 500 GB memory (upon connecting an external HDD), as well as a capacity of its connection to a car cassette radio and a display with the keyboard, today will not find anything on sale!!! For the device the conception All in One is the priority.
Analyzing the development of the computer technics I came to the conclusion that the multi-component devices are the future. The more microelectronics develops (becomes cheaper and reduces its sizes), the more functions the consumers will want to have in their devices. That is why the idea of creating a multifunctional mobile device ocurred to me.

To provide high sales, the device must be in demand and not to have competitors at the market. The device, in my opinion, has both of them. The device should become a minimum substitute for a PC:
It will be easier to design it on the basis of the mobile platforms Symbian and Windows Mobile. Symbian is more preferrable due to its stability, but it doesn't have many exterior programs created for it. It would be acceptable if integrated with an all-formats multimedia player with a capacity of chosing playlists according to the folders, which does not exist nowadays. It is necessary to add the Internet pagers which the exterior manufacturers have.
The office package Symbian also does not have the functions of editing.Windows Mobile is more diverse with its applications and a plenty of programs from different manufacturers. Spelling mistakes do not add stability. Other than that, it will be more expensive. If the processor has at least 800 MHz (megahertz), it is possible to put Windows Mobile on Linux.
It has the shape of a monoblock. The screen is not less than 600*800 pixels, it is sensor, 6,5 - 7 inches so that it would be easier to create an automobile device with a disk driver of a 2 inch size on the basis of this device. The device should have a built-in GPRS /3G phone-modem to simplify the process of entering the Internet and to have a voice connection. The USB ports are necessary for connecting the external flash cards and HDD. 2-3 of them would be great because somewhere there should be a connector for the keyboard as well, it's impossible to disconnect the flash card every time. Bluetooth is needed to provide connection to other universal devices. An analog output is for a monitor connection. Any size connector can be made on the condition that there are adapters in the set.

The set of device can also include a folding USB keyboard for easiness of entering the information while working with different applications. The price will be extremely low. A big battery is not necessary, it will only increase the weight. The device will not be cheap and more likely its owner will have a personal automobile.
It is necessary to make downloading of various navigating programs possible.
A browser, a mail client and office applications are needed as well. The device should become a minimum substitute of the PC, a tool always close at hand. I agree that the price of the device will be higher than the rest, but due to the absence of any analogs and a wide variety of programs it will occupy the top segment at the market.

In the future if there are proper programs, connecting sensors of the automobile's electronic system to the device, it will be possible to make it a diagnostic computer of a car with a lot of capacities to adjust the automobile's systems.


Wall-painting by the projected image

Even a person who doesn't have drawing skills will be able to paint the wall of a building or an apartment manually.
You have to project a desirable image on the wall that needs to be painted. Then you have to outline the image and paint the necessary elements with the colour which is used in projecting this part of the image.
When it's a digital image, the picture is projected from the slot of the memory card which records the image. If you have a slide, the image projection is performed by a slide projector.
The main condition is to fix the projector firmly, so that the image doesn't shift.
I tried it myself. Gioconda came out very well.

April 2009

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